Deathstrike Missiles in Spearhead

Of course... source programmable guidance!

There were some unusual developments yesterday. First off, my copy of White Dwarf issue #371 (US edition) arrived in the mail even before showing up at my LGS. This is strange in that mine typically is delivered two weeks after becoming available for sale in the shop. The second odd thing is that it arrived in good condition instead of being crumpled, bent, battered or torn as is normally the case with my subscription. Apparently my postman is not keen on tabletop gaming. The third and perhaps most disturbing development however is that upon opening the magazine, I almost instantly found genuine content directly applicable to my games of 40k.

Whaaaaaaat? Surely something is amiss here.

In this issue there is an article about the Spearhead variant of 40k which concludes with new rules for a pair of Spearhead Formations, written by none other than my man Jervis Johnson. Aside from further fueling my recent fixation with the other JJ, this actually raises a question for me relevant to playing the game itself. I know... this keeps getting more and more bizarre, doesn't it?

My question pertains to the so-called Destroyer Formation, comprised of 1-3 Heavy Support units specified as being of any type. At the cost of an additional 75 points the vehicles in this Formation receive the special rule, Preparatory Barrage, which says that you get to fire all their weapons once after deployment and any pre-battle moves have been completed. So does this mean that if I'm playing a game of Spearhead using my Blisstonian 9th, I would be allowed to launch all three of my Deathstrike Missiles before even the game's first turn?

Really? While that might sound great to Guard players with a penchant for doomsday weaponry, amongst whom I count myself, it nonetheless strikes me as being somewhat overly powerful. I understand that Spearhead should not be regarded as a finely balanced set of rules, but come on... really?

To answer this question my first course of action was to ring up Nottingham so as to ask the old man himself for an explanation. Unfortunately though it seems Jervis is no longer accepting my calls. I therefore am turning to you 28mm generals, my wonderfully erudite and sagacious WH40k readers, for your opinion on the matter. Am I reading this correctly, that this really would let me fire off all three missiles in a singularly impressive salvo of ultimate doom?

Like I said that just seems a little over the top to me, but what do you think? Part of the appeal for me in using a trio of Deathstrikes was not their in-game effectiveness (or lack thereof) but rather the dramatic tension created as they countdown to launch. I therefore might actually miss that aspect of the models' unique rules were I to make full use of the Preparatory Barrage. I suspect the presence of this type of Formation would also encourage my opponent to either simply Reserve everything if possible, or else at a minimum to adopt a more open deployment than otherwise might be considered. It's fun to think about though.

Regardless, one thing this has taught me is that even when it comes to reading White Dwarf, no matter how jaded you may have become, it is still important to pay attention and keep your eyes peeled...

... you might actually see something interesting!

Okay, that's it for now. I hope all of you have a great day, I'm off to find my copy of Spies Like Us. :) Oh yeah, and if you get a chance please let me know what you think about this business regarding the Destroyer Formation. Take care, friends!

EDIT: While preparing this post, my daughter got a hold of the issue of White Dwarf in question and tore the cover off. Ha! So much for it being in good condition....

Citadel Woods Finished

Even though it took me a couple weeks longer to finish painting this group of Citadel Woods than I'd originally planned, I am still very happy and am quite satisfied with how they turned out. So much so that I decided to have some fun taking pictures of them today. I painted the miniatures seen in the following photos at least 15 years ago, but the trees were not finished until 3am this morning. Actually before going to bed I went to put my new terrain pieces away and promptly dropped two trees, snapping off a number of branches and breaking a few leaves. It was therefore another hour before I had everything repaired which made for an exciting conclusion to my late night hobby session.

I love this terrain kit! I think Games Workshop did a fantastic job on it and I look forward to working on my next batch of Citadel Woods perhaps sometime in the coming weeks, though likely not until the new year considering all the projects I'm juggling. I have another three sets of Woods still unassembled which I will paint in the same fashion as these. I like this scenery so much, however, that I now would like to eventually get a couple more kits to be painted as burned up sections of forest that have seen heavy fighting. I think that would introduce some nice variety to the collection and would look pretty cool as well.

That's all for later, though. Regarding the matter at hand, here are some pictures of my newly completed terrain pieces:

Citadel Woods #1

Citadel Woods #2

Citadel Woods #3

A surprise encounter.

"Look out, he's right behind you!"

"Artillery's hard work, lads, so be grateful for the shade."

The garrison was alert for any potential threats...

... but they still didn't stand a chance.

"Hi, I'm a wizard. I wear sensible shoes."

All the [miniature] world's a stage...

These trees were a real joy to paint and it's nice knowing that they'll be of use no matter how much jumping I do from one army project to another. I'm not sure what this coming week will be like for my hobby activities as Thanksgiving is on Thursday, but I will nonetheless endeavor to get in as much hobby time as RealLife allows. If you can't tell by my choice of subject matter in tonight's photos, I've had Warhammer Fantasy on my mind recently so that will likely receive a fair share of my attention.

That's all for tonight... happy painting and gaming, everyone!

The Redwood Raven

So if the current internet buzz can be believed, it looks like the Stonecutters will be getting a Spruce Moose* after all. Woo-hoo!! I haven't had a whole lot of time today to check out the news but I hope this is legit. My first impression is that the design doesn't look terribly intimidating or mean, instead reminding me of a cross between a bumble bee and a lawn dart. Or something else equally silly. But for a Simpsons-themed army I think this model would be perfect. It's got a lot of comedy potential and will be a nice centerpiece for the army once I get around to them.

I'm psyched. The Blisstonians already have their Copperhead in which to chauffeur around Plant Manager Burns. Meanwhile it looks promising that the Stonecutters will have a Storm Raven to spearhead their drunken (airborne!) assaults. Hooray, flyers for everyone!

Sorry I've been quiet the last few days. I became ill at the start of the week but am feeling better now. Painting continues on the Citadel Woods although there has not been a whole lot of progress since my last post. More to come soon... cheers!

*From "$pringfield," episodes #1F08. Another plane belonging to Mr. Burns, the Plywood Pelican featured in episode #FABF16 "Midnight Rx", would also provide suitable inspiration/precedent for a Stonecutters Storm Raven. I cannot however find any reference pictures of the Plywood Pelican so that's why I'm going with the Spruce Moose. It's also from an earlier episode so that gives it primacy.

Citadel Woods WIP

Wow, where did the week go? These have been some busy days for me without as much hobby time as I'd anticipated. I've started painting the first three of my Citadel Woods and have managed to make slow but steady progress on them. With many army projects needing my attention, and now with a deadline to finish a few in time for AdeptiCon, painting terrain seemed like the obvious choice for this week's focus. Good call, Jason.

I had originally hoped to finish these kits by the end of tonight but I realized a few days ago that such would be unlikely. Nonetheless I'm satisfied with what I've been able to get done and think it will only be a couple more days until completion. Well... so long as my supply of washes does not run out first, that is. My usual camera is currently jet-setting about the country with my wife as she attends a series of conferences, and I'm too intimidated to try out her fancier camera for the first time without proper supervision. I therefore present to you bad iPhone photos of partially painted and unassembled terrain... hooray!

Is this perhaps the worst iPhone photo ever taken? I think so. Those blurry, undifferentiated blobs of brown are actually nine trees and their three bases. At this point they have been primed black, then sprayed again with Leather Brown colored primer from The Army Painter, followed by a thorough washing of Devlan Mud. After drybrushing the trees, roots, and logs I will next paint the stones and add flock to match my gameboard. There are some details to pick out like skulls and whatnot but otherwise that should be it.

Now for the leaves. Because it took me so long just to clean off the seventeen miles or so of mold lines from the trees and branches that when it came time for the leaves, I simply said "never mind" and decided not to bother with them. This is a very rare concession for me as I am normally diligent when preparing my minis, but I really don't mind slacking in this case. I'll clean up the worst offenders once I start clipping the pieces off the sprue but I'm not going to worry about the rest. You are therefore forewarned should you happen to see any leafy mold lines in future pictures that get posted here. Thank you but there's no need to point out my laziness. I know the mold lines are there and I am at peace with them.

Another sacrifice I have made for the sake of expedience concerns my choice of colors and my overall approach to these pieces. Originally I had thought I would paint and highlight all the leaves individually and mix in a variety of shades of green like you see on the trees in White Dwarf. When it came time to actually start painting them, however, I realized how insanely stupid that would be if I ever wanted to actually finish these and move on to something else. So instead I primed 'em black and then blasted away with Army Green colored primer, then washed liberally with Thraka Green. In these pictures I've also almost finished drybrushing the leaves with Iosan Green (P3) and will follow up with one more light drybrushing to pick out the more prominent edges. After that I'll just need to paint the little branches poking through the canopy and I can then start snipping and gluing.

As mentioned I am running low on the two washes I've used so far. The pots you see to the left were new and filled completely just this past Thursday night when I opened them for use on these woods. I believe I should have enough Devlan Mud to complete the job but it's going to be close. Otherwise they're all now empty. I've been feeling increasingly ill and worn out beginning yesterday so I'm grateful to be working on a relatively simple painting project. Thank goodness for my happy little trees... time for me to paint some more leaves!

POWER!!! etc.

It's been dark and stormy times on my little island these past four days. We lost power on Sunday and only had it fully restored earlier this afternoon. Fortunately I did have the opportunity to check out the initial wave of pictures from Games Day mere hours before the lights went out as the alternative would have been too cruel. Wow, those are some cool models. I don't know exactly what I'll do but I definitely want to mash up a Raider or two for some terrain. Making a Sarlaac pit seems like it would be fun. Once I have time I'm eager to catch up on whatever else has come to light about the upcoming product release.

To celebrate the power coming back on I took the above photograph of my Circle Orboros guys. Since referring to them in my last post I realized that I had not ever taken a group shot of the happy bunch and decided I would set them up once I could charge my camera's battery. How's that for a dorky celebration? Also I looked into how many points they comprise, the total of which turns out to be 21. When I am again motivated to work on this stuff I believe I will next paint a unit of Wolves of Orboros or Tharn Bloodtrackers to add some cheap numbers to the army. I don't anticipate that being any time soon, though.

Prior to the power outage my wife's parents were visiting and stayed with us for several days. I've therefore done very little painting over the last week but I should now be able to get back to it so long as the electricity doesn't go out again. (Fingers crossed as the storms have hardly lessened.) With the hobby time that I was able to scrounge up I assembled the first of my Skorne models, a unit of Praetorian Swordsmen and the warlock from the Skorne starter box. It may not be much but I'm thankful that I accomplished anything considering recent circumstances.

Okay, that's it for the update. Time to paint.

Breaking Fealty

I haven't mentioned Warhammer Fantasy since 8th edition was released when I decided to start a new Bretonnian army. I've been quiet about this undertaking since then because I have not made any progress that seemed positive or worth discussing. The past couple of months have seen me become increasingly frustrated with my choice of army as I've struggled with list after list to make an army that lives up to my early enthusiasm for the chivalrous blue bloods and their filth-encrusted peasantry. I simply cannot find a force hiding in the Bretonnian army book that I like.

When I chose to go with the Bretonnians I was somewhat aware of the challenges this would bring, though not entirely so. It would seem my "careful" consideration was not as carefully considered as I had thought. I was not foolish enough, however, to believe I would be able to come up with a super-tough list capable of competing against strong opponents. All I really wanted was an army to use in some fun games against friends, thus allowing me to return Warhammer Fantasy to my gaming rotation after my interest in it had waned over the lifespan of the previous edition. Yet even with these modest goals in mind I have not been able to put anything together that excites me enough to begin investing the time and money needed for a new army.

So what's a fella to do? For now at least I'm stepping back from my pledge of loyalty to Bretonnia and the Lady of the Lake. While it may cause my Dwarf army to label me as an oath-breaker and refuse to ever fight for me again, I think this is my best option. I don't want to fall into the trap of forcing myself to work on an army I'm not excited about as there are numerous other projects I'm eager to tackle. As a finicky and easily distracted hobbyist, I finally learned that it's almost impossible for me to get very far with an army when I'm less than fully enthused about it. Despite the frustrations necessary to bring me to this point, I am at least grateful to have recognized my issues with the army before putting forth any significant effort.

Eventually I'd like to get back to these Bretonnians though I have no idea when that will be. It feels to me as if the army currently lacks in variety, a problem which is exacerbated by the fact that several characterful units I'd like to include are not well represented in the range of Bretonnian miniatures. For example, weren't there at some point more than five Questing Knight sculptures? Two rank-and-file variants just seems to me woefully inadequate for a unit that should have lots of individual personality. In this particular case I could set about trying to convert or kit-bash some models of my own but that sounds like a lot more than I'm willing to do at this point. Therefore, confronted with an army book that doesn't particularly captivate me and a range of miniatures that leaves me wanting, I think it would be best to set aside the spurs and lance until Bretonnia receives its update for the new edition.

While I'm content to hold off on the Bretonnians, there's still the fantasy itch that needs to be scratched. I started to look again at what other armies I might want to collect but so far nothing has jumped out at me. I thought it would be fun to work on a new army to coincide with the latest edition of the game but it's certainly not necessary. I still have a couple of functional armies which I can use in friendly games of Warhammer, but they've become sort of stale feeling to me over the years. Nonetheless I would like to work on something of a more fantastical sort so as to satisfy that part of my gamer soul not currently fulfilled by chainswords and plasma guns. Hmm, what to do?

Oh yeah, there was that other game that had captivated my attention last winter... Hordes. Or more properly, HORDES!!!! (PP's penchant for capitalization still cracks me up.) The game offers lots of cool monsters, crazy warlocks and spells, and some really bizarre factions to choose from, all of which sounds to me like a winning combination. Plus every model I worked on before was a blast to paint and I doubt I could ever tire of painting monsters. The more I think about, the more convinced I am that this is where I need to look to get my fix of fantasy gaming.

In fact the last miniature I painted before my unanticipated five month break from the brushes was a Lord of the Feast for my Circle Orboros gang. I already have 20ish points of Circle Orboros painted and another 15 points or so worth in boxes, as well as 35 to 40 points worth of Skorne models waiting around in their original packaging. Therefore my plan going forward is to cease worrying about doing something new for Warhammer Fantasy and will instead turn to Hordes for my swords-and-sorcery gaming enjoyment.

Best of all, this is the perfect time for me to return to Hordes as the faction of my dreams is just now being rolled out, the Blindwater Congregation:

Crazy voodoo alligators... I think I may have just fallen in love.

The Drones of Sector 7G (Illustrated)

A couple of weeks ago Old School Terminator of Dark Future Games posted an interesting piece entitled "How Do You Pick Units? How Do You Build Your Army?" In it he examines the thought process that he goes through when planning out an army, offering up his Tyranid army as a very thorough example of how it works in practice. I find these trips through a gamer's list-making mind fascinating and informative, in addition to highlighting for me just how different people's approaches to army building can be, and indeed to the game itself. OST hoped to start an open discussion on this topic and asked for additional examples of this, so I thought it might be interesting (well, for me at least...) to do the same for my new Imperial Guard army that is just now getting underway.

In OST's case he studies the attributes of his favorite few units from the codex and then develops a theme for his army around those key features, selecting additional units that will allow his to play the style of army he envisions and to meet specific strategic needs. I admire his clarity of thought and his careful consideration of the impact his choices have on his army's tactics and overall performance. My own approach to building an army is perhaps somewhat more... quixotic? Keep that in mind as I do not mean to present this an example of good army-list building technique but really more as a contrast to the well-reasoned approach of someone with tactical acumen like OST. So with that caveat, let's being:

The Drones of Sector 7G

Sometime during the summer I began to think that it would be fun to put together and paint some models to go with my 40k terrain project, named "Sector 7G" in honor of that part of Springfield Nuclear Power Plant where Homer Simpson works. In one episode Mr. Burns points to Homer and asks who he is, to which Smithers responds, "One of you drones in Sector 7G." From that little exchange came the idea of putting together a squad of servitors and so that I could eventually let them wander around the table in scenario games blasting away randomly at nearby targets and being a nuisance for the competing armies. They'd be my drones and I'd have another Simpsons reference in my gaming nonsense... hooray, mission accomplished!

I call the middle one "Grimey."

I was quite satisfied with having a handful of zombie-like, cyborg workers run amuck on my table and left it at that for a while. It eventually occurred to me though that if I'm going to have a bunch of servitors, why not include a Techpriest to lead them in their efforts to repair 7G? Thus was born Techpriest Enginseer Smithers, as well as the realization that I could take the joke even further and put together a Springfield power plant-themed army to represent the workers and defenders of my Imperial manufactorums. I've been trying to find a way to get excited about the Guard again after several years away from them, having previously played a conventional Infantry Co. style list with LRBT platoon in support, and so even the most tenuous of connections to the Simpsons proved to be enough inducement for to me start a new army. Ever one to beat a joke in ground, especially bad ones, I was off to get my Codex to see what other things could be twisted to my silly plan.

Techpriest Enginseer Smithers

With the themed I'd chosen, I would obviously have to somehow include Mr. Burns himself in my army. After searching through a lot of potential models, I settled on using the Astropath from the Imperial Advisors pack. I think he has a suitably frail yet sinister appearance for playing the role of Mr. Burns. I don't want someone as important as Monty Burns to be just a mere astropath, however, so I promoted him to Primaris Psyker and thus he can appropriately be the leader of my army. Maybe in the 41st millennium Plant Manager Burns would be a psyker, though I prefer instead thinking of his powers as representing his control over the Sector's automatic defenses (Lightning Arc) and the dread he inspires in others (Nightshourd). Also, as my opponents are likely to recognize the model as an Imperial astropath, I'm hopeful that it will be easy enough to explain that he's just a simple counts-as Primaris Psyker.

Plant Manager Burns

Next up for consideration was the section of Troops, from which I elected to employ Penal Legion squads. These guys will provide the labor force needed to keep 7G humming along despite the massive damage it's suffered, in addition to being responsible for defending the plant in times of danger. I didn't want to worry about the command structure that you get with Infantry Platoons, nor did I feel the grunts of 7G befitting of the prestige and myriad special weapons available to Veteran squads. The independently functioning nature of Penal Legion squads seemed like a good way of portraying the various work details, each lead by a Crew Boss but otherwise with nothing special about the members of the squad. The deployment options gained from being Scouts should help them get to their job sites faster, while being Stubborn should let them demonstrate their tenacity and commitment to their work.

I've chosen to use Kolony Militia heads from Pig Iron as a way of suggesting the faceless, anonymous regard in which Plant Manager Burns sees his workers. On the subject of modeling, I would like to note that I am gluing on grenades despite Penal Legionnaires not being armed with them. I foresee possibly wanting to adapt this collection sometime down the road into a more traditional mechanized veterans type of army and therefore would like to keep my options as open as possible concerning WYSIWYG. That way, whether working for now at Sector 7G or on some other battlefield in the future, I expect these minis to be versatile enough to serve me for years to come. Here then are the first of the Blisstonian* 9th Volunteers:

Work detail, Blisstonian 9th Volunteers

At about this point my wife asked what I was up to and, upon hearing of my plans for another Simpsons 40k project, pointed out that I had overlooked an important asset available to Mr. Burns... his hounds. She insisted that during a game Mr. Burns be able to "release the hounds," or else my army of cartoon references would be an unmitigated failure.

Of course! She was right and I thought it was a great idea but was initially unsure as to how to do that with Imperial Guard. My first idea was to go with a squad of Rough Riders as Burns' hounds, modeled using Chaos Warhounds and sporting a variety of comical laser guns and rockets. Something about this didn't seem right, especially as the models would have a much lower profile than a normal squad of Guard cavalry. I then pictured Burns sitting next to one of his dogs, which somehow stirred within my mind the image of a fire-belching IG sentinel. I liked that and decided Plant Manager Burns would have Sentinel squadrons as his hounds. Initially I was leaning toward Armoured Sentinels, but after playing around with some various lists I now believe I will most likely build them as Scout Sentinels. This is partly due to the Scout variants being cheaper in points but also because I now really like the Pig Iron heads and want to also use them for my vehicle crews.

Release the hounds! Well... build the hounds, then release them!

I've mentioned before that I had ordered the Manticore/Deathstrike kit just because I really liked the model and thought it could be fun to use in scenario or narrative gaming. At the time I had no intention of including it in an army, but I saw this Drones project as a great excuse to make use of the Deathstrike Missile Launcher which I'd already assembled some months ago. It's a highly unpredictable, one-shot gimmick in which to invest precious points, hence why it's probably one of the least deployed weapons in the Imperial Guard's tabletop wars. But the doomsday quality of the Deathstrike seems to me like just the sort of thing Plant Manager Burns would want to have at his disposal. I concede that it is really more of a Hank Scorpio type of thing, but I believe Burns40k would also see the value in a weapon of such destructive potential. One should be enough at a thousand points but when this army grows any larger, I'd like to include more of them.... Kaboom!

"Exxxxcellent."

Casting about for more ways to expand on the army's theme, I recalled Mr. Burns' preference for the "personal touch you only get with hired goons." Therefore to act as his bodyguard, keeping Burns safe from xenos and disgruntled employee alike, as well as to give his authority some extra muscle, I've chosen to include a Storm Trooper squad equipped with the army's only pair of special weapons. I had tucked away enough of the older style of storm trooper miniatures to make up a full squad of them and was happy to see that their gas mask faces appeared to be a good match for the Pig Iron ones I was using on the rest of the army.

Hired Goons

I would like to have a way for those Storm Troopers to get around the battlefield more quickly and the IG Valkyrie has got to be one of the coolest kits ever released by Games Workshop. Mr. Burns is conveniently known to ride in style so for this army I'll be including an IG bird to serve as his limousine, but one that is armored and flying because it's the future! Even if it's guaranteed to get shot down every game, this is one of those units I really want to play around with as it just looks like a fun model to have. When I get back to expanding on Sector 7G, one of the first terrain pieces I plan on adding will be a landing pad so I don't think a single flyer would look terribly out of place in this collection. Also, should things turn against Plant Manager Burns, I'm sure he'd appreciate being able to make a speedy departure.

Burns' armored, flying limo

It would be reasonable for the Imperium to keep an eye on someone like Burns so to round out my HQ section I've included a Lord Commissar. Again I did not want to go with any of the infantry command squads for this particular army, thereby hopefully avoiding any confusion about Burns being an astropath. I do think however that a commissar could fit in nicely and monitor both Plant Manager Burns and those loaf-about carbon blobs of the Blisstonian 9th. The commissar with the plasma pistol and sword is another of my favorite models that I've looked forward to painting for a long time so he goes into the list-mix, too. Overseeing this entire operation will therefore be a stern and dutifully suspicious member of the Emperor's Nuclear Regulatory Commissariat.

Emperor's Nuclear Regulatory Commissar

Another individual whom I felt compelled to include in my army was a Homer stand-in of some sort. Fortunately I've got Guardsman Marbo to adapt to my purposes, and as GW saw fit to simply reverse the letters of one syllable, so shall I. My counts-as Marbo will therefore be known as "Safety Inspector Moher." While I still haven't entirely planned out this conversion, I'll probably end up using mostly Catachan parts and one of these tox-guard heads from MaxMini. I plan on replacing the usual demolition charge with a dangerously mishandled radioactive fuel rod. Thus in true Homerian fashion, Safety Inspector Moher will be both a champion of his fellow workers and simultaneously one of the greatest threats to their lives.

My inspiration for Safety Inspector Moher

By now I was pretty happy with the army lists I had drawn up and was ready to stop at the 1500 point mark. I thought the inspiration well had run dry and that I wouldn't be able to wring anything more out of the codex. I looked at some other heavy support choices and more elite options but couldn't see a good way to work any of them into my theme. I did not want to force anything in that doesn't belong and thought to myself, "Oh well, I don't need to fill the FOC completely." The list making was done, or so I believed until I remembered one last thing...

Lawyers! I have no doubt that Plant Manager Burns would want legal council while navigating the many byzantine layers of Imperial governance and the myriad perils that would entail. Burns' legal defense team will be played by the more bookish-appearing Inquisitor henchmen models and will be a counts-as Psyker Battle Squad for the army. I don't think it will be too hard for people to accept that their powers, Weaken Resolve and Soulstorm, represent the terrifying potency of such an aggressively litigious group of attorneys. I'm not too sure what to do about the unit's overseer, though I'm considering using either a Necromunda Enforcer or a spare commissar model to help keep the egg-heads in check.

The start of Burns' legal defense team.

And that was basically it... ta-da! As best as I can recall that was the thought process I went through in developing my plans for this project. So this time around at least there wasn't much worry given over to tactical performance or cost efficiency and instead most of my decisions were based on the visual and interpretive expression of my chosen theme. Along the way I wrote out a bunch of different army lists to see how the point totals were shaping up and am still tinkering some on the margins with the leftover points. Below are the lists that I'm going to be incrementally building toward for use in Sector 7G. Thanks for sticking with me through all that and indulging me in this narcissistic exercise. While I may have nothing enlightening to offer in all this prattle, at a minimum I hope I've explained how my army came about, one which I'm sure to most veteran generals would likely appear to be just an odd and hopelessly outclassed assortment of units masquerading as an army. I imagine the more cut-throat gamers will still snicker and roll their eyes, but you've now seen why I'm willing to put the effort into making this a reality.

And so at long last, the army lists:

Primaris Psyker

Techpriest Enginseer: 5 servitors, heavy bolter, mult-melta

Psyker Battle Squad

Penal Legion Squad

Penal Legion Squad

Scout Sentinel: heavy flamer

Total Points = 500

Primaris Psyker

Techpriest Enginseer: 5 servitors, heavy bolter, mult-melta

10 Storm Troopers: plasma pistol, meltagun, plasma gun

Penal Legion Squad

Penal Legion Squad

Penal Legion Squad

Penal Legion Squad

2 Scout Sentinels: heavy flamers

Deathstrike Missile Launcher

Total Points = 1000

Lord Commissar: plasma pistol, power weapon

Primaris Psyker

Techpriest Enginseer: 5 servitors, heavy bolter, mult-melta

10 Storm Troopers: plasma pistol, meltagun, plasma gun

Guardsman Marbo

Penal Legion Squad

Penal Legion Squad

Penal Legion Squad

Penal Legion Squad

3 Scout Sentinels: heavy flamers

Valkyrie Assault Carrier: multiple rocket pods, heavy bolters

Deathstrike Missile Launcher

Deathstrike Missile Launcher

Total Points = 1500

Lord Commissar: plasma pistol, power weapon

Primaris Psyker

Techpriest Enginseer: 5 servitors, heavy bolter, mult-melta

Psyker Battle Squad: 5 additional Sanctioned Psykers

10 Storm Troopers: plasma pistol, meltagun, plasma gun

Guardsman Marbo

Penal Legion Squad

Penal Legion Squad

Penal Legion Squad

Penal Legion Squad

Penal Legion Squad

Penal Legion Squad

2 Scout Sentinels: heavy flamers, smoke launchers

2 Scout Sentinels: heavy flamers, smoke launchers

Valkyrie Assault Carrier: multiple rocket pods, heavy bolters

Deathstrike Missile Launcher

Deathstrike Missile Launcher

Deathstrike Missile Launcher: dozer blade

Total Points = 2000

I've got about another week left of vacation and plenty still to assemble and prime before going home to the enveloping humidity of the South. I try to remain as flexible and open as possible so if anyone thinks of any Simpson references that I've missed but could include in this project, please let me know. As always, I welcome any and all suggestions, criticisms, angry muttering, et cetera. I know it was a lot to go through with the only reward being a few pictures of unpainted miniatures. Oh joy. Thanks again for letting me share with you my thoughts about this army... updates to come as things get painted.

*In episode #5F23 of season 9, “The Joy of Sect,” Homer joins a cult whose leader promises to take his followers away to the planet Blisstonia. Great episode, I highly recommend it.

We Have a Winner(s)

I want to start by saying that I am sorry for being so late in announcing the results of my "Hey, Win Some Stuff" contest. I did a poor job planning out the day and have been racing around trying to get things done. The good news though is that I'm going to skip whatever blather I might otherwise have penned about the release of Warhammer 8th edition and instead get right to the interesting stuff. Be sure to stick around after the main announcement, though, as I've got a few other surprises for everyone.

So congratulations to the winner of the new Warriors of Chaos army, Sons of Taurus! Clearly he has already traveled far down the path of damnation and proudly bears the mark of Chaos. I therefore suspect it was Tzeentch's scheming that caused his number to come up when I cast that fateful d8 this morning. I'm quite happy to see them go to such a welcoming home. Contact me at [removed] and I'll get everything packed up and shipped to you right away.

Again, I really appreciate people getting involved and helping me out with this blog, and particularly for making this contest a lot of fun for me. I hate the idea of any of you going away entirely disappointed and so I have some consolation prizes for the rest of you who entered. I've lamented before my current lack of space for my hobby, particularly since becoming a family man and selling off my old businesses, and I really like the idea of handing off some neglected projects for which I no longer have room to keep around. I therefore spent a chunk of time today digging around old boxes and picked out some items for each of you based on the type of projects I've seen you discuss on your own blogs. This of course involved a lot of guessing as to what might be appropriate so let me know if I messed up on anything as I'd be happy to take another swing at it. Here then is the run down:

Gyro - You strike me as a fan of miniatures in general and in all their many varieties. I feel like if anyone can come up with a good use for an assortment of Lord of the Rings miniatures, it would be you. Included in your selection are nine Mordor Orcs with swords and shields, six Mordor Orcs with bows, two with polearms, two with two-handed weapons, one Orc with a standard, one champion-looking guy, and a shaman. The last dude is already glued to a base, the rest are all loose but otherwise untouched. I also want to send you a Mordor Troll still in the original packaging to add some muscle to those Orcs, and lastly an unopened blister of Sam & Frodo in Orc Armour. I think they're pretty funny and would be a fitting part of this bunch.

Kuffeh - Are you still actively working on your Dwarves? If so I've got a few boxes of basic dudes that I'd like to send to you. It's one each of the Dwarf Warriors, Dwarf Thunderers/Quarrellers, and Dwarf Cannon/Organ Gun box sets. A few weeks ago I opened them for the first time in search of drinking mugs that I could use for my Stonecutters. Otherwise they are untouched as I didn't see anything helpful for that project. I've also got a new Gyrocopter that I'd like to include if you're interested.

Murl - You're an Imperial Guard player, and if there's one thing that makes Imperial Guard players happy, it's tanks. If I'm not mistaken, I spotted recently a Graia Pattern Hellhound on your blog. If you're interested in having another, I've got a complete and unassembled Forge World Graia kit that I'd be happy to send your way. Also if you're still looking for pieces from the old Leman Rus kit, I've got one of those as well if you want it. Lastly I'm including for you a pair of FW Cadian Veterans with Shotguns upgrade packs. I hope these will help add to your awesome army. [EDIT: Oops, I forgot to mention there's also a Cadian Heavy Weapon Team box for you as well.]

b.smoove - I had a hard time finding anything appropriate for internet celebrity b.smoove. Your stuff is all so fantastically converted and creatively kit-bashed that I'm really not sure what would be of use for you. I do know however that you're a fan of historical miniatures and have recently mentioned wanting to spend some time on those of ancient Rome. (Welcome back from your trip, by the way. I apologize for not having said so sooner.) I don't know if you focus on any particular period of Roman history but I've got two sets of plastic Romans from the Wargames Factory picked out for you. One is the Caesar's Legions box set containing 48 legionaries from the late Republic including enough pieces for three sets of command groups. The other is labeled as 12 Early Imperial Roman Auxiliary Cavalry, but with the possible exception of the command guys they could probably fit into most Republic and Imperial periods as well.

Mihalis "Cadaver" Skalkos - It's looks like all of your commission work keeps you fairly busy so again I wasn't sure what would be a good selection for you. I think I remember you were considering working on Skaven again, and though I don't have a whole lot of those, I would like to send some to you if you wish. I have 3/5 of a box of Skaven Plague Monks still on the sprue for you (I'm sorry, I don't know what happened to the other eight fellas), three unopened blisters of Plague Censer Bearers, and one blister pack of a Clan Pestilens Plague Lord. Since you're an Ork player I can't resist the opportunity to also send you a box of Ork Nobz and a Painboy blister to go with them.

Beef Nuggets - To help fill some of those gaps you mentioned in the Nuln army you're now working on, how about two new warmachines? One is a new Empire Artillery box (the cannon/mortar one), the other is the Empire Volley Gun/Rocket Battery box. Also I've got a box of Empire Wizards, Empire State Troops, and a blister pack Master Engineer Repeater Pistol. I hope these will help you out.

Matty - I think I've scraped the bottom of the Wood Elf barrel with those Dryad bits I mentioned to you, though I do have 12 assembled but unpainted Dryads that you are welcome to have if you like. I don't know how excited you still are about Necrons, but I've finally decommissioned the Necron army that I've been working on for my brother off and on for most of the last decade and thought you might want some of the remaining elements of that project. I have for you one box of Necron Warriors (unless you've already got 120 of them, there's always room for more...) and one Heavy Destroyer. Also I picked out for you two Necron Immortal blisters, one Flayed Ones blister, and two loose Flayed Ones. Let me know though if you're not all that Necron-crazy anymore and I'll go have another look around for you. Oh, I almost forgot... I've also got for you one each of the Citadel Hero and Urban Basing Kits.

DrGabe - For having the temerity to try to crash my party and turn my Followers against me (what is this, 7th grade all over?), my gift to you is a bitterly contested, lifetime rivalry to be fought out in small scale on tabletops the world over. Of course considering we only see each other once every decade or so, this really is kind of a hollow gesture. Oh well. I hope life is treating you well, buddy!

Damn, that took a while... whew. Please everyone, I really am sincere about wanting to give these miniatures and whatnot away to you. Not only am I thankful for your patronage and support, but you'd also be helping me out as well. So hit me up at [removed] and tell me where I can send all this stuff.

Thanks!

PS - This is my 151st post on diceRolla... woo-hoo!

PPS - Just to be clear, the middle initial [removed] is the letter q as in Quincy. And don't worry, I'll remove all that once I've heard from everyone.

Less Than 12 Hours Left

I got my copy of the Warhammer rulebook yesterday and oh my gaaaaahd, it's freaking huge! The book is absolutely beautiful and very well done, but as a gaming reference it strikes me as rather impractical. Not too big of deal if you already plan on buying The Island of Blood set but certainly frustrating for gamers on a budget. Games Workshop has definitely succeeded in making another high quality product, I just hope they've not created too much of a sticker-shock barrier for new people considering taking up the hobby. Nonetheless, the bibliophile in me rejoices at the sight of such a lavish tome and I think it's cool that so much attention was given to the hobby and background sections. I have happily spent much of the last day looking at all the pretty pictures and skimming through random bits of text as it will probably be sometime before I'm ready to begin digesting the rules themselves. It really is such a nice book that I want to take my time exploring and enjoying the material within... at a cost of about 75 dollars, I think it deserves to be savored awhile before turning to its more utilitarian purposes.

Okay, nothing much going on here otherwise. Just wanted to post a little reminder about the giveaway I'm doing tomorrow for those of you who have not yet entered. To those of you who have already signed up for a chance to win those Warriors of Chaos dudes, thank you very much as I am really excited to have the opportunity to give this collection of miniatures to one of you. I've been cleaning up more of the house and found some packets of WoC bits that I ordered to bulk up a few units, the plan having been to make use of leftover arms and such from the other box sets I'd bought. So in addition to the items mentioned in my previous post, the winner will also receive a single horse from the Marauder Horsemen kit plus 5 sets of Marauder Horsemen bodies, shields, and left arms. Also included in the prize package are eight sets of Warriors of Chaos torsos and capes, right arms, and heads to allow for even more enemy-chopping fun.

I've decided to put a deadline for entry on this contest just to make sure I don't run into any last minute troubles. Therefore to be eligible to win, Followers of this blog need to leave a comment on the original post by tomorrow at 8:00 AM (EST) letting me know that you want to be included in the drawing. At the time of writing there remains a little more than eleven hours to have a shot at winning this new Warriors of Chaos army. If you're not already playing a Chaos army, there's enough here to get a big start with them. And if you don't play Warhammer Fantasy, here's a chance to get an army to help introduce you to the game. So come on and sign up.

Hey, Win Some Stuff

Sorry I haven't posted anything here in quite a long time. For the last several weeks I've not been able to get any time for hobby stuff other than reading the occasional game book, most notably the Malifaux rulebook and the Bretonnian army book. (Malifaux was interesting and looks like fun, and while the Bretonnia book is certainly nice, I think it's showing its age a bit.) Not being able to paint has been frustrating but I'm hopeful that I'll soon be back at. All the home remodeling projects are finally complete and my Father's Day gift from my wife was a yet-to-be-picked-out hobby desk. For more than two years now I've kept all my gaming and painting junk portable and packed up when not in use due to life being something of a whirlwind. Therefore the prospect of having somewhere I can safely leave my projects overnight is very exciting for me. Even if my painting does not improve, I'm pretty sure my productivity will as I've managed to set a rather low baseline for myself these past few months.

Okay, enough of the non-update update. Now for the winning of things. I'm very grateful for those of you who have signed up as Followers of this blog and I appreciate your contributions to it. You've made this a much more enjoyable experience for me. So as a way of saying thanks I thought it would be cool to pass on to one of you an army project I know I'll never have time to work on myself. To celebrate the release of the new edition of Warhammer a little more than one week from now, I'd like to give away the selection of Warriors of Chaos boxed sets and blister packs pictured above. On Saturday, July 10th, I'll randomly select one of the Followers who have commented on this post (all you need to do is let me know you're interested in having a shot at the prize) and then I'll announce the winner that day at 8pm EST. Simple, right?

Here's a list of what the winner will receive:

WoC Battalion

Chaos Lord on Daemonic Mount

Sorcerer of Chaos

Nurgle Chaos Sorcerer

Warriors of Chaos (boxed set with 12 guys)

Chaos Marauder Horsemen

Chaos Warriors (the one with 3 guys)

Chaos Knights

3 Chaos Trolls (one of each pose)

A long time ago I was gung-ho about cranking out this army and getting it on the table, but life intervened and this project kept getting shoved further and further down the priority list. Eventually the enthusiasm was gone and last summer I realized that I was no longer even interested in hanging on to them, but I wasn't exactly sure what I wanted to do with the evil little bastards. With the new version of Warhammer only days away this seems like as good a time as any to find a new warlord to lead them, so hopefully at least one of you will want to give these savages a happy home and take them off my hands.

Thanks again for taking an interest in my quiet little niche of the interwebs. I'm confident that things will get (mildly?) more interesting around here soon.

Bretonnia for Eighth Edition

[Note to Google-searching readers: This does not contain any tactical, strategic, list building, or gaming related advice or discussion of any sort. Sorry if you are looking for help in those departments, it's not to be found here. Cheers! - Papa JJ, 12/17/2010]

With the new edition of Warhammer just a few weeks away from it's official release, I've been thinking a lot lately about starting a new army. For the past year or so I have been interested in getting back into the game and made a few faltering starts on different armies. None of them excited me all that much and it seemed as though I lacked the enthusiasm needed to see any of them to completion. I've enjoyed playing Warhammer for a very long time and it was kind of frustrating to just drift away from it without finding anything that would again capture my imagination. There are plenty of other games to play but not being active in such a classic as Warhammer Fantasy felt like it left a void in my hobby.

Hope was restored to me when I heard news of the impending arrival of an updated Warhammer. I think it's a great time for the game to get a new breath of life and with that I've found my interest in it revitalized as well. It's nice to be excited about Warhammer again. I haven't paid a lot of attention to the leaked details regarding all the changes introduced but it definitely sounds like eighth edition represents a significant overhaul of how the game works. This seems, therefore, like as good a time as any to start up with a new army so that I can learn both my chosen force and the game itself together.

To that end I have carefully reviewed my options and thought deeply about what type of army I would like to play. At long last I have chosen to walk the path of honor and valor, hereby pledging my fealty to the realm of Bretonnia. I put together a unit of Bretonnian knights years ago when they were included in the starter set with Lizardmen but was too intimidated by the prospect of heraldry that I never painted them. Otherwise I have no experience with the fnacy lads. I've always admired the look of a fully painted Bretonnian army and the quasi-medieval style of its range of miniatures. After Adepticon I was all fired up to do a Hundred Years War army for Warhammer Ancient Battles but my interest in this was quashed once I saw how expensive it would be. I think a Bretonnian army will be a nice alternative and also a more pragmatic one considering the slim likelihood of me finding someone who wants to play WAB.

I have no real expectations for this army other than for it to serve as a vehicle for learning the new edition of Warhammer. In a spirit of optimism I anticipate working on all of the requisite heraldry and barding will really challenge my painting abilities, hopefully pushing me to get better by trying new things. And even if they're not terribly effective units I still envision having some big blocks of peasant infantry which should offer a good change of pace from painting their mounted social betters. Right, then. It may not be much of a plan, but I think it's enough to get me started. I am looking forward to a summer of lances and longbows.